What questions would you ask in an interview?
There are different questions we ask everyone we meet daily to get to know more about them. Through the gradual revealing of information, we paint a picture of them in our minds and use that in our behavior towards them. If this image we painted of them is something we can relate to, then we’re probably much more inclined to talk to them and build relationships because we feel similar to them. But we’re quite resistant to changing the picture of someone else in our head, sometimes even when newer information becomes available, and that’s why first impressions are so important. If I were to try to optimize 20 minutes I had with someone I just met to get to know them as much as I could and as best as possible in the time allotted without regard to social etiquette, small talk rules, and general manners, my questions would be these that follow.
Who are your heroes?
You can learn a lot about a person based on their heroes. You can learn an interest they have which gives you information and leads on what type of activities that person partakes in. You can learn why they respect that person which tells you what values they respect and the personal characteristics they strive to present to the world. And you can learn something new! People love talking in depth about a topic they know well about to those who aren’t so versed.
What is your favorite free-time activity?
You can learn what they are genuinely interested in. The activities someone does in their free time are usually at the core of their passions. People who have the internal motivation and desire to do something not required of them have a genuine love for it. It’s something you can’t take away from them. They strive to perform better at that activity purely for themselves and gain their joy and satisfaction based on goals and metrics they set and see to themselves. And when someone has such a genuine passion, it really translates through their voice. You can feel their love for whatever their free-time activity is. People with passion are incredible to work with and be around.
When is the last time you talked to your parents, relatives, or siblings?
Assuming the person you are asking doesn’t live with their immediate family or close relatives and has positive connections with them, this question gives good insight into the respect they have for relationships aside from friends and significant others. I have huge respect for those that keep their parents and siblings close by frequent communication. It translates into all other relationships, in my view, and shows their level of EQ and care for the people that were pivotal to the position they are in at any given moment.
What is the last thing you learned?
Learning is gift. It’s the one thing that moves us forward on a daily basis into the light of the future. Those who learn everyday will be better than they were yesterday and thus accept that they are not a completed work but a work in progress. People who understand that they are a work in progress are enviable because they wake up everyday seeking to change something about themselves and thus change the way they interact with the world and by that change the world itself. These are the people you want to surround yourself with. Everyone is clueless in this world, even the people who seem to “have it all figured out” — theres no such thing — but those who accept they are clueless, question; and those that question, learn. And those that learn, change.
What is your most irrational fear?
This allows you to understand their mindset a little bit; specifically the line they draw between irrational and rational. No one likes a person who says “no, its not possible.” or “no, that can’t happen.” We like to be next to optimists who say “anything is possible” or “let’s make it happen.” And their reactions to certain situations are often based on what I like to call their circle of rationality or, in other terms, the scope of their optimism. Those who see many things as rational are more optimistic than those that see fewer things as being rational. But most optimists aren’t usually faced with a circumstance so unimaginable that reveals to others the strength of their optimism. So this question helps me understand how they define what is irrational. And by that, I understand what their circle of rationality is. I once met a guy that said his most irrational fear was having a snake slither up his toilet while he was on it. He lived on the 12th floor of an Apartment complex in Los Angeles…The likelihood of that happening is .000001% (made up number but fairly accurate). But the extreme irrationality of his fear told me that he believed a number of things were rational, or possible. And he was that type of guy: extremely optimistic, sporting that “can-do” attitude.
If I gave you a million dollars a day but you had to spend it by 11:59PM, how would you spend it?
I love this question. It helps me understand how they think of money. It’s not money people seek but the experiences that one can buy with it. So I seek experiences and am generally inclined towards those that see money as a sideline instrument that helps orchestrate experiences not those that see money as a goal or end-all (and there’s nothing wrong with those type of people; to each their own). Keep in mind that the question says spend. So you can’t do any sort of investing that compounds or bets the money. You have to consume it. This allows me to understand what type of experiences people dream of or want to go through. The patterns of spending can also apply to the current amount of money someone has. For example, my friend once said he would take half a million to throw a party in Vegas like never before. In his regular life, he spends a good fraction of his income on the club scene with friends and collueagues often. It’s what he likes to do. So this question helps you gain an understanding on what people already do with their money, how they think of money as a concept and, what type of experiences they seek.
What is your contrarian truth?
I’m attracted towards those that have an entrepreneurial spirit so this question is usually geared more specifically to those types of individuals. But this question basically asks what is one thing that you know that no one else in the world agrees with or knows. This reveals the level of curiosity someone has or how inquisitive they are. People who question to the point of conviction and remain steadfast in their beliefs are able to motivate people around them to believe in whatever it is that they believe to be true. People like this are energizing and radiant. You want to believe in them just because their convictions are so strong. And thus you want to surround yourself with these types of people. Some people won’t be able to answer this question because they can’t recollect their contrarian truth. But it is my honest belief that everyone has one.
What is one trait all of your friend’s possess and every friend you make hereafter should possess?
This gives an insight into what trait they think is the most important in friendships. But the trait they respect most in their friends is usually the strongest trait they possess themselves. So it helps you understand what friendship trait they have most strongly. I would say honesty. I want all my friends to be honest at all times despite how it may come across and I, myself, am big on being honest towards them. It’s a classic case of people aligning with their perceived similarities.
In writing this I realized that these questions say a lot about me and what I value as well. As I continue to grow, I will keep adding to this.
